That reminds me of my trip into work each day.
Judging by my last few movie reviews, you’d be forgiven for thinking that I only watch animated films. 2012 probably isn’t going to help that, as huge bloomin’ chunks of it are all CGI’d too.
Not to worry though, it’s currently 2009 and scientists have discovered that a series of highly implausible events are occurring. It’s probably best to just gloss over that. The bottom line is the Earth’s core is starting to heat up rapidly and boffins predict the end of the world by 2012.
Skip to 2012 and indeed events are unfolding as expecting. Tectonic plates are shifting and breaking up around the globe, tsunamis are consuming entire continents and volcanoes are spewing liquid hot mag-ma everywhere. The end of the world is indeed nigh.
Fortunately, there’s a backup plan. Governments in every major country have joined forces to build a fleet of ruddy great ships to act as Arks. Yep, that’s right, it took us seven years to complete the new Wembley Stadium, but the Chinese have managed to design, plan and construct an enormously cavernous underground ship yard in a remote region of Tibet, complete with seven giant ships, each fitted with full en-suite bathroom facilities in each cabin, state of the art video surveillance systems (even in the most awkward parts of the engine room) and a completely unnecessary, dramatic countdown timer system… all in under three years. It’s no wonder everything is made in China these days.
As far as disaster movies go, it does what it says on the tin. The effects are really quite impressive and the action sequences are chock full of over the top destruction and carnage. I can’t really fault that side of things. The problem with it (besides any dodgy plot set up at the beginning) is that it just seems to go on forever. If they skipped some of the unnecessary Hollywood cheese and just got on with the action, they could’ve easily shaved 40 minutes off the near three hour run-time and it would’ve been a much more enjoyable film for it.
6.5/10.