700 years into the future, and they still haven't given robots opposable thumbs.
Picture the scene:
It was stupid o’clock on a Sunday morning. Vampires across the country had just gone for a pre-bedtime slash and hung themselves upside-down in a darkened room before daylight fried them. Birds had still got toothpaste all around their beaks and 60,776,237 residents of the UK were still being visited by the Sandman.
And what was the 60,776,238th person doing at this horrifically early hour?
He was going to the cinema to see WALL-E…
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"If you tell me to chill out, max 'n relax one more time, I'm gonna ram this right up your..."
After watching Iron Man and The Incredible Hulk in recent weeks, did I really want to see another superhero film? Err, not really… but things could’ve been worse.
Anyway, Hancock is a superhero with a difference, as he’s a bit washed up and really not a nice chappy. Well that’s the general gist. Throw in a chance encounter with a PR dude, a bit of Extreme Makeover: Superhero Edition, some totty in the form of Charlize Theron, a quick ‘twist’ and that’s your lot.
I almost hate blogging about films like Hancock. You see, I wasn’t blown away by it and I didn’t hate it either, and writing about a film which leaves you pretty indifferent is just no fun. Hmmm. Basically, it lacks any ‘killer’ action scenes that you’ll remember for years to come and it’s not Will Smith’s finest hour (and a half), but at least it does stay watchable.
Meh. 6/10.
Now if someone had told me before I watched Wanted last night, that it was about an all-knowing-sewing-loom-of-doom, then I’d have thought they were spinning me a yarn. I know that’s not as ridiculous as a film about a girl with teeth in her flange, but it’s still ‘darn’ stupid.
Dodgy plot aside, Wanted rattles along a fair pace and the action is stitched together reasonably well (even if it is mostly just ripping off ‘The Matrix’). Yes, there’s some arse-clenchingly terrible moments, but there’s also a few chuckles and the odd half decent thread woven in too. Generally, it’s enjoyable mindless fun, but the last few lines of the film won’t do you much good if you’ve got low self-esteem.
Oh, and it’s got a montage. Even Rocky had a montage.
6.5/10.
